The end of a once-treasured relationship may instigate the beginning of unsolicited mixed feelings. One minute, you are in good spirits. The next, you are bursting into sad tears. You cannot contemplate what’s going on in your life, but you know you deeply miss your ex.
Your sixth sense holds you back from fixing things between you and your ex-boyfriend or ex-girlfriend. Should you just put these rollercoaster emotions to a stop? Come back together with your ex? Absolutely, you do not know what to do.
It’s devastating how the transition is not turning out as smoothly as you had envisaged. You do not talk anymore, but you got too attached to them to let them go. The truth of the matter, getting your ex off your mind is not a change that happens in a flicker of light. It’s a gradual process, just so you know.
Missing My Ex, Is It Normal?
You might think you are a weirdo, when suddenly you miss your ex. Maybe you are lonely. And every time you see yourself as a pathetic person for having such feelings, especially if you recently had a break-up. You’re human, so you don’t have to blame yourself for the things you cannot control. It’s perfectly normal to miss your ex.
Perhaps you miss their personal quirks. You miss the way they made you feel you are not alone. You miss the long night cuddles or the extra-long hugs. Or you miss the blissful vacations and adventures you both had. You miss their warm smiles and the gentle kisses that sent chills down your spine. Whichever the reason for missing them, you are totally okay and mentally sound.
You just need to be easy on yourself. This feeling of missing your ex ultimately dies off with time. As days and days go by, you’ll realize you feel less and less fond of them. However, it may persist for a while. And lead you into interrogating yourself whether the split was a right move or you messed up. It’s outrightly okay, remember.
How Do I Make My Ex Miss Me, Too?
Depending on which grounds the two of you broke up, you may decide to get back together. It seems like the more distant you are, the stronger your love grows for them. It’s driving you crazy learning that you and your intimate best friend are turning into strangers.
Let’s hit you with reality. It may be a bitter pill to swallow, but you will definitely avoid the path of making an unworthy choice. If the relationship is over, it’s over. If they showed no interest in rekindling your love or they cheated on you, it’s not right to force issues. If they initiated the break-up and not you, you need not to waste your time bringing them back closer to you. You should dismiss the idea of making your ex miss you or begging them to patch up things with you.
There’s nothing as heartbreaking as wanting someone who does not want you back. You’ll die a depressed person when the world( your family and friends ) still needs you. You can dare make your ex miss you only on these occasions: You are still talking to each other, You both left the relationship on friendly terms, or you’re sure they did not fall out of love with you. If none of these are true, then relentlessly put your mind into moving on from the relationship and living your life without them forever.
What Should I Do To Stop Missing My Ex?
The struggle of not missing them is real. Yes, you are in shackles of intense grief and longing.
But is it worth it to focus on your past and forget the future awaits you? Your answer is certainly no. Then it’s time to discard the feeling of missing your ex at all costs. Here’s how to start off on the right note:
1. Cut off Contact Completely Between You And Them
The no-contact rule is an effective way to get over a person you once loved and cared for. Following it means you do not call your ex over the phone, by all means, you do not pick their calls, too, unless you sincerely have to or you do not text them. Neither do you physically meet them up or connect with them on social media.
It may seem difficult at first, but nothing will deter you when you get in the swing of things. The no-contact period should last at least 60 days. During this period, you are sure to regain the person that you were before. You are likely to incline towards self-love and self-care. You will even discover you lost yourself in loving someone else, which should not have been the case. For you to love another person, you should invest in loving oneself first.
2. Get Rid of Their Stuff
Your ex’s stuff maybe the constant reminder about your ex and the factor intriguing you to miss them so much. Getting rid of those items could be the only way to ensure you do not yearn for their presence. But getting rid of them should not trigger you into making irrational decisions, for instance, throwing your ex’s stuff away in a litter bin just because you’re filled with rage and sadness over your face. They could hold you responsible for the loss of their items.
For that reason, collect them and keep them in a self-storage container in a place you rarely frequent in your apartment if you want to get rid of them immediately. Later ask your ex what they would like you to do with their things. If they suggest coming to pick them up, list the dates you are available and set a deadline for pick-up. If you do not want to see them face-to-face, you could request your friend to stand in for you at the time they are retrieving their stuff.
3. Keep yourself occupied
The old adage that stipulates, “an idle mind is the devil’s workshop,” is not far from the truth.
If you want to get over your ex successfully, you need to minimize the number of free times you find yourself with nothing to do. These moments will divert your mind to start mourning over your ex, and that would not be good in the first place.
How do you keep yourself busy? You can increase your working hours. If initially, you worked for 6 hours, you can think of working for eight hours or more. You can implore the idea of engaging in charity works over the weekend. Or spend more time with your close family members and your friends. Being more socially active is key to mending your past both mentally and physically. It’s a significant part of the healing process.
Should I Sign Up For a Professional Relationship Coach?
Healing is a tricky affair depending on how long you were committed to a relationship. The amount of time your relationship lasted is proportional to how fast you will stop missing your ex.
It might be hard getting over a partner who was a staple in your life on your own, even with the above-listed techniques to apply. Sometimes, if not careful, you may drown in depression and excessive thinking, yet your mental health is very important.
In such an overwhelming situation, it’s wise to seek the assistance of a professional therapist or a relationship coach to achieve your post-breakup goals. A certified therapist helps you bounce back into a vibrant and more joyful person by killing the guilt, the sadness, and the regrets that arose from the big split. Plus, they inspire you to aspire for more meaningful connections and a healthier relationship.